Clouds and Growing Old

Today I was staring up at the sky being alive and all, when I started studying the clouds. I saw many things; a dragon, a face, a heart, letters that I decided were my name, just to name a few. I tried to see things, and interpret what they meant. Were they signs? Were they answers? I tried to make these big masses of water into things that made sense to me, to my insignificant thoughts, my small world, and my one perspective. That was wrong of me I realized. If I really want to learn, to be spoken to by something greater, I need to see things as they are not as I want them to be. While I am creating my own meaning and messages I'm missing something else. Then again maybe there's no meaning in anything. Maybe I should stop looking entirely. One things for sure, if you want to see signs, you can see them anywhere and make anything of them, that's why they don't seem to be of any help.

I find myself learning life lessons from simple everyday things in life, like clouds, and right after that happened, it came into play. From one hospital to another, witnessing the cruel hand of age, I saw two family members today lost, and getting taken over by disease. It happens, it's life, but it doesn't mean it's easy for anyone. I visited my Grandpa, such an amazing man with such a good spirit and a pleasure to talk to even in such a horrible just plain unfair state. While visiting him we learned we must make a decision about putting him permanently in this certain nursing home tomorrow. Here's the kicker "the sign" if you will. The name of his would-be roommate is the same as the new "friend" my grandma has in her life to get her through this. Is that weird or what? What does that mean? What is that telling us? Or in this chaotic insane world we live in, is it merely coincidence? Well probably coincidence, but I still believe God is hilarious and does get messages across in a way we will understand, but we can't assume we know what he is saying. If we don't get it, I'm sure he will be more clear the next time. Anyway, I'm so thankful there are people taking care of our elderly, because I don't think I could do it, it takes a strong wonderful person.

Once again, talking to people who have been here a lot longer than me, I realized:
* We are all just people.
* We are all just doing the best we can.
* We all make mistakes.
* Different things work different for different people.
* There are no answers found on this earth to our metaphysical questions...ever.
* We are all growing and learning till the very end*