I need a bigger plate.

Hello,

So book #4= Summers Crossing by Truman Capote because I was told "every girl needs a little Capote."

To be honest I don't have much to say about this book, and I did come to find out it was never meant to be published in the first place. But what I really wanted to comment on was the author. It seems there are those who live a life of suffering and restlessness to bring the rest of the world entertainment. These people are called artists. The best kind of art comes from a terribly sad and complicated soul. Does it have to be this way? I always wanted to be able to call myself an artist, but is it worth so much pain? Maybe the more rewarding life is the one where you smile because you can, don't over think things, and just appreciate the art. I seem to be right on that line of artist and appreciator. It's a perplexing place to be.

Anyway, life.... I just have no idea what to do with it? Oh boy here comes the over thinking again. I wonder if we knew what came after life if we would treat life more preciously, or if we would do less with it. "Well Carrie, I suppose that would depend on the answer." Should we constantly put ourselves in unfamiliar uncomfortable situations and learn, or can we just live simple and comfortably? I feel like both options leave you with regrets. Here I go again wanted to do it all.

Life seems overwhelming today, I feel an immense pressure to make all the right choices, and make them right now. I know it sounds just so silly. Anyway I'm going to try and take it an hour at a time, because a day just won't fit on my plate.

(Should I transfer colleges? Where should I study abroad? Do I have the right major? What do I want to do? Will I even be able to get through college? Should I live somewhere else? What does it mean to be 20? Am I taking advantage of my freedom? Am I using my free time wisely? How can I make everyone happier?)

I'm reading books 5 and 6 at the same time, might take longer to write about them.